Jalebi – Bucketlist

We’re conditioned that being abused by those we raise is acceptable. The illogic goes, you raised ‘em, they’re permitted to do anything to you. “No matter what” or “how old”, you “must” stand by ‘em. Bucketlist Longevityhack™: No one has an inherit right to hurt you.

Jalebi is delicious, Death-Free™ goodness originating from pure Love.

Bucketlist confession: I lived with a horror for years. I thought it was normal to be maligned, attacked, and worse. Yes, there’s worse.

When I looked at my abuser, I saw yummy cookie-batter fingers, flour fights. The one I shielded from bullies and worries. Nights tending fevers, years of baking birthday cakes, stitching costumes, thousands of lunch notes, bedtime stories. I only understood protecting my abuser. When my Mother said my abuser prays for me to be harmed, I became upset with my Mother. I was also confused about what abuse wasn’t okay. Bucketlist Lifehack™: Zero abuse is okay.

I saw my Love. Not my abuser’s jealousy or hate. I kept every promise no matter cost or exhaustion. I also create the best nicknames. Like, “Insicaa” for my hero Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind. “Sweets” ‘cause I loved and always made fun yummies. Anything craved, I’d recreate. Jalebi was an obsession. A dessert from Asia and Africa of white flour and white sugar, fried.

I cannot bring myself to feed those I love crap. Creating safe Jalebi without compromising yumminess was not optional. Bucketlist Jalebi is wowza.

Parenting is giving yours their best chance in life within your means. Caretakers consistently go beyond their means. I certainly did.

Bucketlist Refresher

∞ Young and disabled children are exempt. If someone needs professionals, it’s okay and important to seek help. No one has to give themselves to pain.
∞ Caretaking is a privilege not a burden.

The line between “I love you” and “You’re hurting me” shouldn’t blur. Love is not license to abuse. It took a longtime and fear of being attacked in my own home, again, before I was let go of dangerous conditioning. My abuser vamoosed on their own.

Bucketlist Soulhack™: Guardian angels are no joke. My ex-abuser spreads lies while appropriating bits of me, my hometown. Probably my nicknames. Bucketlist chuckle. Let ‘em have their narrative. Your abuser’s life will be consumed with one thing, you. That they shall not have.

The good you gave is eternal. Jalebi is delicious, Death-Free™ goodness originating from pure Love. The kind that you give. The kind that you deserve. Kiddos aim to be great to those who raise you. Definitely don’t fall below decency.

Bon appétit, Friends.